BDSM Basics: Whips

One of the best known and most popular pieces of bondage gear is the flogger.  Floggers have been used throughout history as a top-notch torture device, however it has taken a bit of a softer turn and become an incredibly erotic tool for use in BDSM.  Used alone or with other bondage gear such as nipple clamps, this tool should not be underestimated and should always be respected.

Flogging isn't easy and requires a lot of time and practice.  If you are new to BDSM and are looking to experience it you can find groups and flogging workshops to help you along.  Through time and patience you will learn proper control to allow you to better please your submissive and more enjoy the experience yourself.  A truly experienced flogger will make it look easy and graceful.  Always start slowly as a poorly landed strike can cause bodily damage if given enough force behind it.  As will all forms of bondage and BDSM you should always know your sub's limits and respect all boundaries.

Each flogger consists of two main sections, the handle and the tails.  The tails, being the 'business end' of the flogger, come in a variety of styles.  Factors that influence the over-all feel of the flogger include the material, the width of the tails, the tail length and the number of tails.

To start off I will discuss some of the various materials that are used when making floggers.

Leather:  Leather is also used for many other types of bondage gear, and for the most part the leather used comes from cows however there are other hides that provide quality leather that is used in floggers.  Some of these are Deerhide, Elk, Moose and Buffalo.  Although each type of leather brings a different feel to the tails the biggest factor in how the leather will feel comes from the manner in which it was tanned and the way it's cut.

Rubber:  Rubber is also commonly used in bondage gear used in many forms of BDSM, but as far as floggers are concerned it is generally accepted as being more severe than leather.  But, as with leather, the density, type and cut of the rubber is the ultimate determining factor in the actual severity of any rubber flogger.

Chain:  Chain is also sometimes used in making floggers, however it is much, much less common than leather or rubber not only because it's more difficult to make but but due to the fact that it makes a much more extreme flogger and shouldn't be used by the inexperienced.

Once you've decided on the material that you would like your flogger to be made of you then need to decide if it will create a sharp bite or a deep thud when striking.

Here are the four main factors in determining how a flogger will feel:

Width:  The wider the tails, the more a thud sensation will be produced, the thinner the tails the more sting.

Tails:  The number of tails attached has a large influence over it's feel, typically the more tails there are the less of a sting is produced.  Most floggers have around 15-25 tails attached.

Tips of the tails:  Rounded or square-cut tips are more of a gentle tip where as pointed tips cause much more sting, and forked tips double that.

Tail length:  Although the type of sensation that is created by a flogger is less dependant on the tail length than the other factors, the length has a very direct influence over the speed of the tip.  The longer the tail the faster the tip will be moving upon contact.  When using a very long-tailed flogger you should pay extra attention to your contact point, it's easy to over extend and create a wrapping of the tails which can mean more pain than is desired and damage to the skin or underlying tissue.  The average length for the tails out there is 16-24 inches.

There is an incredibly wide variety of bondage gear out there and flagellation devices are no exception.  Take your time when picking a product but you should also try out a variety of styles and keep them all within easy reach for when the need arises.

Uncovering The Truth About The Clitoris

The clitoris is often over looked and neglected despite modern female awareness and the understanding of many women of their own sexual being. It is unbelievable that even in these enlightened times how little information is out there concerning the clitoris and how it functions and contributes to the pleasure of a women.

The understanding of the clitoris has to be central to this change. Slowly there is more infomation regarding the clitoris and it isbeing understood a lot more clearly. Most people including doctors and sexual therapists believe that the clitoris is a small pea-sized bump and that a females sexual response isn't as potent as a man's however this is not factually correct.

The clitoris has 18 parts some which you can see like the glans or tip, inner lips and the hood; which is the equivalent of the foreskin in men. The clitoris is a potent part of the female body and important to sexual pleasure. The tips have 8,000 sensory nerve endings – more than any other part of the body. Factor in the requirements of pregnancy and women have much more blood supply to the pelvic area and longer and stronger pelvic muscles. The overall effect is that the clitoris unlike the penis which produces a single powerful explosive orgasm can produce multiple orgasms (up to 100!). It can thus be argued that women sexual pleasure response is more powerful than man’s.

It is time for women to understand the make up of the clitoris. It is now believed that the way the clitoris is interconnected means that all female orgasms through stimulation of the female genitalia are directly linked to the clitoris.

Australian urologist Dr. Helen O’Connel using MRI technology noted that direct relationship the legs or roots of the clitoris and the erectile tissues of the clitoral bulbs and corpora, and the distual urethra and vagina. O’Connel asserts that this interconnected relationship is the physiological explanation for the G-spot and the experience of vaginal orgasm taking into account the stimulation of the internal parts of the clitoris during vaginal penetration. Women who experience orgasm from both direct clitoral stimulation of the glans and vaginal access to the internal bodies distinguish between then in terms of both the physical and general sensation associated with each. (in other words the clitoris is why women get an orgasm from vaginal penetration as the internal clitoris is stimulated).

During sexual arousal and orgasm, the clitoris and the whole of the genitalia engorge and change colour as the erectile tissues fill with blood, and the individual experience vaginal contractions. Masters and Johnson documented the sexual response cycle, which has four phases and is still the clinically accepted definition of the human orgasm. More recent research has determined that women can experience a sustained intense orgasm through stimulation of the clitoris and remains in the orgasmic phase for much longer that original studies indicate, evidenced by genital engorgement and colour changes, and vaginal contraction.

The knowledge of the clitoris is being increased every day but there is still a lot to learn. What we can say categorically is that the clitoris is intrinsic to any stimulation that results in orgasm. For many women direct stimulation of the clitoris can be panful so it maybe better for a women to arouse herself some other way to get wet before concerntrating on the clitors thus providing better comfort. The other option is to use your favourite lube to make things slippery. What ever women do in sexual situations the clitoris has to be remembered either in love-making of self pleasure to en-heighten the orgasm. Concerntrating solely on the clitoris can add variety to female self pleasure. If you want to learn more about female erogenous zones or self pleasure then please visit my site self pleasure for women.

High Tech and High Pleasure: silicone

When it comes to female breast augmentation surgery, most people are familiar with the application of silicone as a standard material. Well, it turns out there are several other uses for silicone, since this versatile material is quite durable. Because it’s highly dependable, silicone is great for making sex toys. Even though it’s a great material for making such toys, silicone usually involves handcraft work, which makes the costs rise significantly.

Despite the increased cost, we think you will really find “premium” silicone toys are worth all your money. There are also male sextoy's available, the most common of which is the fleshlite, fleshlite is a torch shaped object for use in male masturbation. One of the good things about non-porous material such as silicone is that it allows for through cleaning and sterilization, so it means you can share your toy provided you keep it properly clean. For perfect results, always choose boiling your silicone toy for 20 minutes or so, unless there’s a battery pack.

Thanks to its hypoallergenic nature, there’s no chance people will get a rash from using silicone sex toys. If you keep yourself from getting a silicone toy because it’s too expensive, you shouldn’t. Even though it’s more expensive, a silicone toy is a good investment because it will last much longer. This kind of toy is practically indestructible, unless your dog somehow makes it a habit of gnawing upon it. Plus, silicone is extremely soft and supple, with a realistic feel that makes for an incredibly sensual experience.

Silicone warms quite nicely to your body temperature, and rarely does it bring about a rugged sensation, since there are no imperfections or lumps. Just as long as you don’t mind the premium price, silicone toys will provide you with the most satisfying erotic experience. Besides providing you with an incredible sensation and look, this kind of toy will keep you and your playmate happy for many years. You should remind something important, though: using a silicone based lubricant with your silicone toy is not a good idea, since the toy’s surface will be ruined. Water-based lubricants such as Sensual Essence or Climax H2O are doubtlessly the best option for these kinds of toys.

Bondage Basics: Nipple Clamps

Nipple clamps have become very popular with both men and women.  They range from very gentle to quite extreme, more extreme than most people can endure.  Nipple clamps also come in many shapes and sizes some with various accessories to increase the sensations felt when wearing them.

Using nipple clamps

Before using nipple clamps make sure to keep in mind to not limit their use to the nipples alone.  There are plenty of great places on the human body that are just craving to be clamped, most notably the genital region on both men and women and on women the clitoris can be a wonderful place for some more gentle clamps.

But for now let's stick with the nipples, before clamping your nipples be sure that they're nice and erect.  The easiest way to achieve this is to rub them, for many even the right thoughts can provide them with a pair of erect nipples.  But for some the process might call for some extra help, in this case you should consider ice cubes, they do wonders for exciting the nipples.

If you're new to this or just enjoy it to be a bit more 'gentle' you should start by grabbing a larger amount of flesh.  The more flesh you clamp the less the intensity will be, and as you want things taken up a notch you can reclamp with a smaller amount of breast or nipple.  A clamped nipple can be very sensative and should be the object of further stimulation.  This can be acheived through many different means, some common ways to stimulate a clamped nipple are through the use of a feather or other soft product, your partner's parts, such as his or her fingers or tongue also work wonders.  Some people enjoy products that poke, giving some extra pain, but I believe the best way is through a mini vibrator, just turn it on and let it lightly touch the tip of your nipple.

Many people either have much less sensitive nipples or enjoy seriously intense sensations and pain.  For those of you who fall into one of those categories, don't worry, there are nipple clamps out there just for you.  The most basic form is the 'endurance clamp', this is simply a non-adjustable nipple clamp that has one setting, high.  Once clamped these hold firm and can be pulled on for some extra intensity.  There is another type of extreme nipple clamp that has teeth, these clamps typically don't have any rubber padding and provide the user with a very sharp bite, creating a high amount of pain.

A couple nipple clamp safety thoughts

Don't leave the nipple clamps on for too long, some clamps restrict blood flow somewhat, so 15 minutes should be your limit before giving the nipples some recovery time. And remember, removing the clamps can be the most 'intense' part of the whole scenario as blood flow returns rapidly to the nipple and nerves bounce back to their original positioning.

It's also a good idea to regularly clean your nipple clamps with soap and water, the last thing you want to do is get gross nipple clamps that could possibly cause an infection on your nipples.

Don't forget, nipple clamps are not for women only!  Due to the fact that most women's nipples are a bit larger than men's nipple clamps are often a bit easier to use on women, but men's nipples need attention too.

Male Sex Toys

Face it, when it comes to shopping for sex toys, most of them are targeted at the female customers. Only some adult toys are available out there for men’s pure pleasure. Assumed there are few, and the next article will particularly detail some of them for your next trip to your much loved adult shop or on-line shop will be for you rather than your partner. Quite a few things that is on the list will also help couples to have a better relationship because it can be used when you are giving pleasure to your partner and you are also getting pleasured as well. At the end you will quickly realize that toys can be just as much fun for you as well as for her.

The Dream Sleeve is perfect for when you want some solo time and don’t feel like using your hand or want something different. This will give a sensation that will leave you breathless to as close as the real thing. Toy like this that are created to go around you and could help you heat up and provide you sensation for you to have an experience that is so natural.

Another toy that is a favorite of men and their ladies are the cockring vibrators. These come in various types and shades. There are even remote-control operated toys offering more stimulation at the right moment. This a wonderful toy to bring you both to orgasm quickly and practically effortlessly as it stimulates you both at the same time. Still, you can make use of it when you are alone and will supply more stimulation you require for a quickie if your partner is not available or you want to do it only by yourself.

The third kind of toy is also usually used with partners. For the second time you can use it on your own. The penis sleeves are made so that they fit around the penis and give you a larger girth to pleasure your partner. They have girth sizes selection so there is something for everybody. Be reminded that if you are planning to use one with your girl, you have to find out what size she wants so you don’t frighten or upset her in any way. Except from having ridges of stimulation in the area outside the circumference which supply her with complete sensations and bring her as well to her climax much earlier, on its interior there are ridges that can supply additional stimulation for man.

Along the same lines of the toy above, are the toys which are worn around the penis and gives additional length. A toy like this is nice for couples because it can provide her additional stimulation for those places that is difficult to get into. These are made from silicone that has a veins on it and the tips is made to have same look like it’s real which also gives more stimulation and pleasure for her. By the use of this toy you will no longer have the feeling that you are insufficient in any means because of length insufficiencies you might feel that you have.

Self Pleasure Tips That Lead To Greater Satisfaction

 

Self pleasure can be great fun and with a little practice women can find greater satisfaction from their alone time. There are many tools and techniques that can enhance your self pleasure expertise. The self pleasure tips discussed below maybe already known by some however a few maybe new to you and require a little flexibility.

1. Vibrators can be big help as they will allow you lessen some of the manual labour involved so that you can concentrate more on the enjoyment. The use of a vibrator can provide precise, powerful physical stimulation to the clitoris and gives the user a lot of command over the excitement.

2. Water can really help self-pleasure and assist a women learn more about herself. A good tip is to lie back with your legs spread in a bath with a shower hose and then directing the stream of water gently on to your clitoris. Start slowly and then play with the pressure, then pulsation and finally the warmth. If you don’t have a shower a trickier but possible method is to slide your bum over the drain so that your legs are up in the air and the genitals under the tap or a little bit easier use Jacuzzi jets if you have them.

3. Why not try rubbing against a something perhaps. Suggested items to use would be a soft pillow, a house hold object or vibrator.

4. Dildos are a wonderful tool for masturbation because they present women with the choice of being able to either take part in clitoral stimulation but also to have the option of the completeness of penetration and to also excite the G-Spot.

Life is all about experimentation and discovering more about whom you are and why stop when it comes to exploring your own body. Have fun and why not get a vibrator. One survey in a glossy magazine stated that 25% of all professional women between 25-34 years of age carry a vibrator in their bag at all times.

The body of a woman is a complicated thing. A woman has several erogenous zones so the only way to understand them is with trial and error to learn what works best. Ladies an orgasm happens between the ears and not the legs. It is up to every girl individually to understand her own body. If she cannot then how can she expect her partner to when it comes to love making. If a woman wants satisfaction then experimentation through self pleasure is the only way for her to ever truly find the ultimate climax. To learn more visit our site self pleasure for women.

How Do I Approach Sex Toy Use For the First Time or If I am Inexperienced

Dildos are a little daunting when you first get them out of their packaging. Most companies don't give you a manual on how to use the sex toy you have just bought. They just presume that you know where to "stick it". This is unfortunate because unless you know what you are doing you cannot feel the true benefit of owning a sex toy.

As a result I have decided to put together a guide here to help those who are approaching dildo use without much experience. It is not a step by step guide but will point you in the right direction.

1. Lubrication

Unlike a penis a dildo doesn’t produce it’s on lubricant so girls it very important to lubricate up. It is a common fallacy that a woman own natural lubricant will suffice, in fact quite often many materials of penetrative toys actually can absorb the women lubricant. Whenever a woman is using a penetrative toy it is vital that she uses a lot of lubricant. Remember most materials don’t slide easily and if not properly lubricated can lead to unpleasant friction that may need to nasty soreness that can last for several days.

2. In the Mood For Love

You will feel discomfort if you try to use a sex toy before being suitably aroused. Take your time with the toy and work your way to arousal through stimulation of other erogenous zones. If you have a vibrating dildo for example; gently caress you clitoris using a gentle buzz setting to get yourself excited if not use your hands. You would’t want a lover to jump right in and the same approach has to be applied to dildo use.

3. Take it easy

The first penetration should be taken very slowly and with deep breaths. Taking these long breaths allows blood to rush to the genitals that help them to engorge and relax. If you take short breaths or hold your breath it stops all of this taking place resulting tightness and tenderness. Once the dildo is inserted I would suggest leaving it in there for a moment to allow the body to get used to the feel of it and give the time for the body to relax properly. When using your dildo don't feel you should use the entire length of the sex toy (do whatever feels the nicest). Some women like deep penetration and others more shallow insertion. Remember that it is your toy girls you are in control and play around with your dildo. Work out what feels nice. Lube yourself up around the genitals and your dildo then rub it against your lips and clitoris teasing yourself and then penetrate it really is a lot of fun.

4. Are We Having Fun Yet?

Do anything you want ladies. Insert the entire dildo or only half of it, put it deeper or shallower, enjoy fast or slow motions (tease yourself when you feel that you are close to climax, stop then count to thirty and begin pleasuring yourself again, let the anticipation build again, stop and repeat this a few times the resulting orgasm will be electric). Enjoy every moment of your play with your sex toy. I like to go deep and hard when I am hot and aroused.

In Conclusion

There is no hard and fast rule about dildo use and the key is to take you time and relax, have fun and listen to what your body is telling you. Remember girls practice makes perfect and the more you use your dildo the more you will understand your body and the greater the delights that will unfold.

Well ladies enjoy the ride but please note after that great orgasm you aren’t finished. Always make sure that you clean you dildo with anti-bacterial soap and water, commercial sex toy cleaner or sterilize it (many dildo are now even dishwasher safe!). Then rinse you dildo and make sure it is properly dried. Then when your dildo is squeaky clean and dry, store in a dry and at room temperature. Then storing in a soft material in a drawer will be fine. Never use a faulty or damaged dildo because the genital tissue is very fragile and can be easily damaged by faulty dildo. Please girls enjoy your dildo they really are fun. If you want to learn more about self pleasure the click the link to my site self pleasure for women.

How Vibrators Kept Women Sane

An illness existed for a long time, since the time of the ancient Greeks, but can no longer be found.  Only women were susceptible to this sickness and it eventually got a very unusual treatment.  This illness was known as Hysteria.  But why did only women suffer from it?  What was the connection between Hysteria and vibrators?  Why are women no longer diagnosed with this disease?

To begin to answer all these questions you should know the origins of the word 'hysteria', it stems from the ancient Greek word 'hystera', meaning uterus.

Unfortunately for the uterus it has had a long, and unhappy history, some in the medical field thought that it would reach out into the rest of the body, causing sickness and disease.  Others thought it made women crazy if over stimulated.

Since the uterus had such a bad reputation it was easy for doctors to blame many unknown illnesses on it, and since Hysteria was caused by the uterus overwhelming the woman it belonged to and making her crazy, it was simple enough to call everything not understood Hysteria.

It all comes back to the uterus and the lack of understanding of how the female reproductive system worked.  But there was a definite trend of who tended to suffer from Hysteria, this included virgins, nuns, widows and the occasional housewife.  But why?  What do these women have in common?

No sex, and no sex led to a severe shortage of "hysterical paroxysm", what we now know as an orgasm.

But because of the fact that masturbation was an unclean and generally horrible act, women had to seek professional help to treat and prevent Hysteria.  Doctors would usually treat women with a manual pelvic massage, thus inducing hysterical paroxysm.

But unfortunately for the doctors this process was often very long, even taking up to a few hours.  Spending that much of a day for just one patient was definitely not profitable.  But to help them, in the mid 1800's some doctors were able to use a water hose to massage the pelvic region.

But thankfully in 1873 a new tool was created and first used in an asylum in France to treat Hysteria.  This tool was called a electromechanical vibrator.  This wondrous tool allowed doctors to help their patients in a matter of minutes, not hours.

Around the early 1900's many people started getting electricity in their houses.  This allowed women to treat themselves in the safety and privacy of their very own homes.  Vibrators started to become much more common around the country.  Sears printed an ad in one of their catalogues in 1918 where the touted their vibrator as being ”Very useful and satisfactory for home service.”

Thus started the great vibrator movement, allowing women a bit of vibrator fun at home, all in the name of keeping them sane.

Unfortunately women can't use that excuse anymore as Hysteria is not a recognized illness, but fortunately they don't have to as sex toys such as bullet vibrators have become so common place.

Get My Ex Boyfriend Back

Are you wondering how you can get your Ex boyfriend back? Then read on to learn some tips on how you can bring your former lover back into your life.

Going through a breakup is a very painful experience. After a breakup most women miss spending time with their boyfriend. That is simply a normal part of experiencing a breakup. However, that doesn't mean you should try to get him back.

Do You Think He Is Worth?

The first decision you have to make is if he is worth bring back into your life. At this point your emotions may be getting the best of you. Inside you are hurting, feeling lonely, and can't get him off of your mind. These are not really good reasons to bring your Ex back into your life. These are simply your emotions getting the best of you.

You have to really stop and think about if he is really good for you. There are all sorts of guys for you to meet and a few them might make for a better boyfriend. Always remember that there was a reasons the two of your broke up.

Give Him Space

The first thing you need to do after a breakup is give him space. Let him go out and have a good time. Right now he is missing some of that freedom he had when he was single. At some point he will get tired of all that freedom. The time will come when he is ready for a relationship again.

Be His Fun Girl

The odds are that he got bored with the relationship he was in. He is looking to have some fun again. It's important that you show him your fun side. You need to stay in his life as friends. Think back to what you were like when you first met. Can you be that same girl again? You should attempt to offer him fun experiences with you. This can help him see that you are that same girl that he fell in love with.

Change Your Look

If you haven't changed your appearance, then you should consider it. Think about getting a new hairstyle, checking out some new clothes, and your overall style. This can help make you feel better, but can also get his attention. This will at least help make you feel more confident and start to draw the attention of other men.

Conclusion

How to get your Ex boyfriend back? Those tips should get you started down the right path. Remember that sometimes you will just need to move on. Sometimes it's just better that way.